I have at hand all 8 seasons of Knightmare, a copy of Grimtooth's Dungeon of Doom and the core rules for Risus.
What kind of badwrongfun will result from combining one of the most unfair killer dungeons ever designed, a rules-light comedic RPG system, and a so-bad-it's-good ITV kids show?
Let's find out.
Specifically, I'm looking for teams to tackle this ULTIMATE FANTASY ADVENTURE over IRC. You'll be assigned to parties of five by submission order, random draw, and/or my cruel whims. May the best team win.
Failed teams will find themselves posthumously aiding the atmosphere of the dungeon, so as to provide an instructional aid to those foolhearty adventurers who come later. Traps, of course. will reset - if they're not changed entirely. After all, the dungeon is an equal-opportunity exterminator.
- Download a copy of Risus from the official website and read all six of its pages.
- Read the spellcasting rules over here if you're wanting to play a magic character.
- Use the Java-based character generator here to - well - generate a character. Be clever; pander to the nonsensical humour of this endeavour. (This should take about 5 minutes, tops.)
- Export it in BBCode format (the second tab) and post it to this thread with any description you feel like writing.
- Weep hot, angry tears as your carefully-crafted character is turned into chum for the Albino Cave Squid.
- Laugh, dammit.
EDIT: Now that I think about it, the Dungeonautica rules for Risus (linked to above, in step 2) hew pretty close to my needs. I think I'm going to adopt (read, steal) its Encumbrance rules too. (What?! Don't look at me like that. They're easy; I promise.)
Essentially, you have 10 item slots, with your standard Gear (armor and sword for a fighter, spellbook, staff, and robes for a mage, etc.) taking up the first slot. Each item you carry takes one slot, no matter their size, with coins, potions, etc. stacking just like this were some sort of MMO or roguelike or sommat. So long as you're carrying less than 10 items, you're cool. Otherwise, life starts sucking.
Protip: be sure to read the next section on fantasy beefcake to see how seriously you should be taking this game. (not very, in case you're too lazy to actually click on any of the links in this post.)
EDIT 2: I need to shanghai someone with decent artistic talent into drawing stick-figure one-panel comics of the various characters' death scenes. (of which they'll be plenty)