Third Edition

Moderator: Logos Invictus

 
User avatar
Friv
Essence 6
Essence 6
Topic Author
Posts: 1072
Joined: 28 Jan 2006, 00:42
Title: Splinter of Mokrelus
Exalt: Elemental
Fighting Style: Spell-Fu
Artifact: The Crucible of Tarim
Location: Toronto
Contact:

The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

27 Jul 2007, 15:06

Cathak Tyr sat on a hilltop, watching as Juggernaut continued its slow slide through the Shadowlands. The creature had begun to move within minutes of the Mask’s death, fading gradually as it passed ever-deeper into the Underworld, but it didn’t seem to be in any major hurry. After a full day, it was still faintly visible as a silhouette on the horizon – a few of General Ejava’s soldiers had proposed hunting it down and trying to destroy it, but the Roseblack was content to let it depart.

“Amazing sight, isn’t it?” Tyr turned vaguely, and then sprang to his feet with a salute. Tepet Arada, the Wind-Dancer the greatest general of House Tepet, laughed easily and gestured for the younger soldier to sit down, letting himself slide down onto the ground and crossing his legs like an old peasant. “Makes it all sort of worthwhile.”

Tyr nodded thoughtfully, sitting back down. “We got a scout’s report from Lookshy. Apparently, the ‘major operation’ that they didn’t want to talk about was an attack on the Walker in Darkness, designed to be simultaneous with this one. They’re reporting him destroyed, as well.”

Arada nodded. “The cat’s out of the bag, now, and the Deathlords have a lot of enemies. Not the least of which are our mysterious friends who told us about all of this.” He glanced back towards the camp, where a faint bustle of motion began as the evening watch changed over. “I dunno about that Kyla girl, but she seems alright. She’s no Anathema, anyway. Never seen anything quite like her.”

Tyr’s thoughts drifted to a very different pair of individuals, but he nodded. “Neither have I, sir. I’ve heard some gods can work sorcery like hers, though. Maybe…?”

“Maybe.” Arada shrugged. “My niece trusts her, that’s what’s important. And she really pulled our fat out of the fire here.” He laughed. “Never would have imagined it, a year ago. All the Dynasty pulling together to actually fight someone we’re supposed to, instead of each other. Nagazzer’s got a hell of a long reach.”

Tyr paused at that. “You really think the Dynasty’s that bad?”

Arada’s mood drained away. “Sometimes I do, boy. When I think about how we could have stopped the Bull. About all the assassinations and corruption. The Dragons would weep to see us.” He fell silent after that, and Tyr fell silent with him. The two sat side by side and watched the setting sun.

“Excuse me, General Arada.” The voice broke through the silence, and both Dragon-Bloods turned to see the soldier standing there. “General Ejava requests your presence.”

“Of course.” Arada heaved himself to his feet, and Tyr stood to salute him. “Stop that, boy. I’m here as an advisor, that’s all. I’m still retired.”

“Of course, sir.” Tyr grinned faintly.

“Bah!” Arada shook his head, trying to disguise a smile, and turned to follow the soldier. And it was in that moment that Tyr saw something glittering in the soldier’s hand, just as the old general glanced away, and he realized that he hadn’t been meant to.

“Sir!” The warning was almost shouted too late. Realizing that he had been spotted, the soldier spun with impossible precision, water flowing from his skin as he brought out a pair of slender needles in each hand and jabbed them towards Arada’s exposed hand, four lightning strikes as each needle left his hand. The Wind-Dancer flipped backwards, letting the first glint off armor, the second fall harmless to the ground. The third caught him in exposed flesh, but the fourth flew high as he flipped, embedding itself in a tree. Arada landed easily, blinked in sudden pain, and fell to the ground with a strangled cry.

Tyr unhooked his skycutter from his waist, thanking the Dragons that military protocol dictated he wear it here, despite the lack of any remaining enemies. The would-be assassin was already drawing forth new needles as he threw, and the jade boomerang sliced through the air to shatter the needles in his hand. Tyr saw the damning glitter of poison as they fell and cursed again, the skycutter returning easily to his hand. “Who are you?”

“Why should you care?” Waves gathered around the assassin as he leapt forwards, and a pair of needles drove at Tyr’s eyes. With a muffled yelp, the Dynast rolled backwards, letting his attacker fall short, and threw an answering attack with his skycutter that flew wide. “You are my third target, so it suits me for you to be here now!”

Tyr backpedaled, realizing that he was again outmatched. “Me? I’m a target?” Fire blazed around him as he poured Essence into his Charms. If someone in camp noticed…

“Important enough to your House, foolish boy. But your future ends here.” The assassin lashed out suddenly with his leg, and Tyr’s skycutter sailed into the underbrush. A second kick caught Tyr in the chest, and he stumbled, but he quickly recovered and set himself into a defensive posture. The assassin grinned… and then his expression went slack, as Arada’s daiklave smashed through his chest. The Wind-Dancer faded into being, his Charms dying, and shook his head grimly, pain still etched in his features.

“The Dynasty. Any success must be met with treason. Thank you, boy. Another of those needles, and I would not be standing.” His face was harsh. “But why us?”

Tyr looked down at the assassin, and his heart clenched. “He said I was the third. Not the second.” He looked up, and caught Arada’s horrified expression. Without another word, the Wind-Dancer turned and leapt, and the sky caught him in its passage as he bounded away. Tyr broke into a run, already knowing where Arada was bound.

By the time he reached the tent, he was sure. It was too quiet, and there was a crowd gathered around, drawn by Arada’s passing. Tyr looked around, hoping someone else would be the first to enter, but found everyone looking at him. Steeling himself, he stepped into the tent.

Arada knelt on the ground by the table, a table which had been overturned in complete silence. He held his burden softly, tears falling from his face, and his voice was a hopeless whisper. “No, we won, girl. We did some good. It can’t end now. It just…” He trailed off, and looked up. Tyr took an involuntary step backwards as Arada stood, the wind gathering around him again.

“Sir?”

Arada’s voice was as hard as the gathering storm. “It’s too late. Inform the army that the Roseblack has been murdered.”
"Some people walk in the rain. Others merely get wet."

Patchwork Champions - You say "to-ma-toe", I say "world-ravaging-laser-beam".
 
User avatar
BrilliantRain
Essence 8
Essence 8
Posts: 5362
Joined: 17 Aug 2005, 14:50
Title: The City of Mod
Exalt: Alchemical
Fighting Style: Primordial-Machine Weaving
Artifact: Eye of Autochthon
Location: Nurad
Contact:

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

27 Jul 2007, 16:45

You just can't let us have hope anymore, can you?
Avatar by Girl Genius

Mod Text is in Green

Do you have enough Tools, King of All Craftsmen?
 
User avatar
Deaths Pale Mistress
Essence 7
Essence 7
Posts: 4757
Joined: 01 Apr 2006, 02:18
Title: Deathlord-Empress of the Underworld
Exalt: Ghost
Fighting Style: Close-quarters combat
Artifact: The Kiss of Midnight
Location: Unholy Stygia

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 05:06

WTF?

Why must you kill the only really cool signature character in ALL of Exalted Friv?!

WHY?!
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
 
User avatar
von Schabov
Essence 2
Essence 2
Posts: 41
Joined: 11 Mar 2007, 09:02
Title: DB fanatic
Exalt: Dragon-Blooded
Fighting Style: Golden Exhalation
Artifact: Fuel Bolt Luncher
Location: Poland

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 07:24

This is just wrong. Dude you killed....no seriously ...you did it... no.... that is just...... no >:<
Image
 
User avatar
Friv
Essence 6
Essence 6
Topic Author
Posts: 1072
Joined: 28 Jan 2006, 00:42
Title: Splinter of Mokrelus
Exalt: Elemental
Fighting Style: Spell-Fu
Artifact: The Crucible of Tarim
Location: Toronto
Contact:

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 09:21

Wow, quite the reaction.

I will say only that there are important story reasons for the Roseblack to be dead - also, as one of the most important leaders in Dynastic politics, she's a giant target right now.

Well, she was a...

If it makes you feel better, the first draft of this had Arada dying too, and I decided I wanted the old man to stick around.
"Some people walk in the rain. Others merely get wet."

Patchwork Champions - You say "to-ma-toe", I say "world-ravaging-laser-beam".
 
User avatar
Dinosaur
Essence 10
Essence 10
Posts: 10456
Joined: 08 Aug 2005, 00:46
Title: Social Justice Kaiju
Exalt: Lunar
Fighting Style: Natural Weapons
Artifact: Audient Quill
Location: Most Emphatically NOT in the Wyld

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 09:49

She should have improved her stats; that Stamina 3 and low Melee just won't cut it. <^_^>
I write stories. No, really.
 
User avatar
Epiphany
Essence 7
Essence 7
Posts: 3792
Joined: 26 Jan 2006, 23:23
Title: Resident Novelist
Exalt: Sidereal
Fighting Style: Running the hell away
Artifact: My Lower Soul
Location: Bellingham, WA
Contact:

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 18:36

See, I'm going to disagree with the general sentiment. Well, not with the sentiment but what's implicit in its expression. Yes, the Roseblack dying is a tragedy and yes she's cool. And damn, that's audacious.

But I like audacious, if it's done well. You have to take risks in writing and you really have to take risks when you play Exalted. The Roseblack dying does a fantastic job of showing how high the stakes still are. And it does an awesome job of snapping the reader's attention from that whole post-climax glow to anticipation of another rise. Like a roller-coaster.

And I think you nailed this. The fact that you're getting that reaction shows you did it well. :)

...coincidently, this is a nice preview of reactions from the readership that also enjoys the Pivot Child. :twisted:

...ahem. I'd say that no one dies in the Pivot Child but the statement wouldn't pass Judge's Ear Technique...

But back to your story. Kickass, Friv. I really, really like Arada's last sentences to the Roseblack as he's holder her in his arms. Very dramatically appropriate, very moving and they had a great feel of real familiarity.

I'm sad. But nonetheless impressed.
BrilliantRain: There are those who would note that sometimes, sometimes, you get the things you really need instead of the things you deserve.
Kailan: If people only ever got what they deserved, the world would be a more miserable place.

My Novels / My Series / My Short Stories
 
User avatar
BrilliantRain
Essence 8
Essence 8
Posts: 5362
Joined: 17 Aug 2005, 14:50
Title: The City of Mod
Exalt: Alchemical
Fighting Style: Primordial-Machine Weaving
Artifact: Eye of Autochthon
Location: Nurad
Contact:

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

28 Jul 2007, 22:45

My original statement was more of a Dino-esque weird riff on "We can't have nice things, can we?" than any real evaluation of my feelings. However, as Epiphany post mirrors my feelings fairly well, I won't belabor the point.

Suffice it to say that I'm not a member of the Roseblack Fan Legion (General Arada ftw!), so I'm not that sad at her passing and I understand why it happened, although I am rather concerned about the power vacuum her death leaves. Given Mnemon's current activities she should find it very easy to take over the Realm. Well until Mommy and her New Husband show up anyway.

Since neither of those outcomes fills me with joy, I hope the Regent and his associates can pull a few more rabbit beastmen out of the hat.
Avatar by Girl Genius

Mod Text is in Green

Do you have enough Tools, King of All Craftsmen?
 
User avatar
Deaths Pale Mistress
Essence 7
Essence 7
Posts: 4757
Joined: 01 Apr 2006, 02:18
Title: Deathlord-Empress of the Underworld
Exalt: Ghost
Fighting Style: Close-quarters combat
Artifact: The Kiss of Midnight
Location: Unholy Stygia

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

29 Jul 2007, 05:48

I dont consider myself apart of the Roseblack fan legion (if one exists), but I've always like the character and her concept since the original 1e core book was released. Reading the other posts though does explain why it was done - I dont like (who does like watching there favorite characters die? No one.), but it does add that much more meaning and depth to an otherwise awesome story.

She will be avenged.
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
 
User avatar
Epiphany
Essence 7
Essence 7
Posts: 3792
Joined: 26 Jan 2006, 23:23
Title: Resident Novelist
Exalt: Sidereal
Fighting Style: Running the hell away
Artifact: My Lower Soul
Location: Bellingham, WA
Contact:

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

29 Jul 2007, 13:04

Deaths Pale Mistress wrote:
She will be avenged.


And that evoked sentiment is why I say Friv did a good job with this.
BrilliantRain: There are those who would note that sometimes, sometimes, you get the things you really need instead of the things you deserve.
Kailan: If people only ever got what they deserved, the world would be a more miserable place.

My Novels / My Series / My Short Stories
 
User avatar
von Schabov
Essence 2
Essence 2
Posts: 41
Joined: 11 Mar 2007, 09:02
Title: DB fanatic
Exalt: Dragon-Blooded
Fighting Style: Golden Exhalation
Artifact: Fuel Bolt Luncher
Location: Poland

Re: The Dynasty's Shadowed Light, Part 24: Falling Petals

30 Jul 2007, 07:55

Anyway I still wait for a story in with Tyr will kick some serious ass by himself. Can I have that please oh please :googly:

P.S. I'm happy you spared Winddancer. Killing him and Roseblack in the same story would finish me off.
Image

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 9 guests